The give and take...

There is a lot of give and take in this life.  I have graciously been on the receiving end of those who have abundantly given love, time, resources, encouragement, and grace...lots and lots of grace.  I like to hope that I have paid that forward in developing a life of service.  A life that seeks to glorify a God who gave it all...a precious Father who without asking for anything but faith and belief in return have IT ALL!  And that's what I do...I have a belief that Jesus hung on that cursed tree to die for me...that He lives in my heart...and He will never forsake me.  So in these precious minutes I have on this earth I will wholly seek to follow His will for me...to have a servant heart like Jesus...and shine His light not because He needs me to, but because I long for that intimate relationship with Him.  

I have struggled recently with how to balance this life I love...knowing full well that there really is no balance.  This is a life of give and take...of abundance and sacrifice...of sometimes saying no to be able to say yes.  God has taken me on quite a journey to learn that lesson.  He has allowed me to feel abandoned to show me that He will never abandon me. He has been there when I felt abused and lead me through with His quite whispers of love and grace.  He has seen me rejoice in the love of the ones He gave me to do this life with and prompted me to recognize His glory in it all.  He has carried me through the times of loss and heartache and helped me see that I.am.never.alone.  He has guided me through academic and professional set backs and then achievements only to teach me more whole heartedly that He is always in the details.  He has brought me into a quiet and passionate relationship with Him through His word.  He has taught me that His word is the compass for my life...ALWAYS!  

No matter the give or take...the ups or downs...the heartache or the rejoicing that occurs in this life...He is the reason for the beauty in it all.  My favorite song right now is Good Good Father by Chris Tomlin.  That's what He is...He is the best daddy we could ever ask for and one day I can't wait to hug His neck and tell Him how thankful I am for who He is!  

#Jesusgirl #goodgoodFather #giveandtake #blessedandthankful

My ego is not my amigo

Pride is a hard thing to wrestle with.  It isn't always intentional and over this last year and half I have learned so much about pride...and the necessity of checking it at the door.  The lesson has been hard and uncomfortable and revealing and rewarding all at the same time.  The Lord has taught me that the famous Dennie McDaniel phrase, "Your ego is not your amigo," is truer than any words that funny man has ever spoken.  My ego is NOT my amigo...it gets me in big trouble and most of the time the trouble is within.  The real battle is in me because on one side of the battlefield  is my heart and the knowledge that my worth...my identity...my purpose is in Him...while on the other side of the battlefield is the enemy in my mind telling me that the disappointment and betrayal are worth fighting over...worth crying over...worth the doubt in my mind over what God is clearly calling me to...worth questioning the One who never forsakes me...the One who loves me despite that doubt and questioning and calls me daughter...who calls me His.  This is what that not so friendly ego gets me...tears, frustration, and doubt.  Who needs that....NOT THIS GIRL!  So instead I come into this war room and I open my battle plan...I open the book where the living breathing word of my sweet precious God is ever present and always ready with His best battle plan for that enemy.  Today when those feelings of frustration and doubt were crashing over me like angry ocean waves and the enemy was in my ear whispering the words that sink deep into the cracks of my soul where he knows my weaknesses are all I could concentrate on was that betrayal that cut so deep.  I couldn't hear my Father's patient sweet calling on my heart to surrender it all to Him.  I pulled into my driveway after being gone two days and all I wanted to do was get out of that car and go straight to this room.  What a blessing this war room is. The precious presence of my Father is felt here, and is exactly the space I needed to be able to clear the enemy's words from my mind.  As hot angry tears of frustration and disappointment streamed down my face I opened my bible and a business card fell out.  A couple of months ago when I was anxiously waiting in a Starbucks to give the news of my departure from my job to a man that I respected greatly a complete stranger walked up to me and said that it was heavy on his heart to give me this business card he had been carrying.  He said he felt the Lord clearly tell him that I needed to know...really know...the words on that card.  At the time I thought that the words on that card were meant for me to get through that day...to deliver that news that I had been anxiously waiting to give.  As usual the Lord knew when I would need those words...it wouldn't just be on that day.  It would be today.  He knew today I would need to see that card and remember that He is always there.  He always knows what I need when I need it.  He knew that today would come..He knew that those tears would fall...He knew that the enemy would be in my ear whispering his lies.  We have an ever knowing Father who loves us completely and knows us

as His child.  We only have to surrender it all to Him and He will deliver the words on the card.  He will deliver the words that our hurting heart needs to hear.  As it was that card fell out of the bible in the place it had been holding in the book of Colossians.  My eye immediately went to Colossians 3:1-17.  I want to end this entry with those words...the words that God delivered to the Colossians through Paul.  
Living as Those Made Alive in Christ

3 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is your[a] life,appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

5 Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature:sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. 6 Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.[b] 7 You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. 8 But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander,and filthy language from your lips. 9 Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.11 Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised,barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do,whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

My prayer today is that you will all live as those made alive in Christ.  That is who we are!  We are alive because Christ is alive in us.  What a gloriously beautiful truth to settle in to today and everyday!

#notlookingback #sightsetonHim #Hispurposelivesinme #goodbyetothatego #aliveinHim