I mean 38's not old...really it's not even close compared to my sweet Sally Faye who turned 83 on July 14th. The years that have flown by just boggle my mind. How does it happen...how is it that one moment you're 18 and getting ready to enter college and then you're almost 38 and have a daughter who will be a senior in a matter of weeks? It just doesn't make sense. It makes me feel blessed and sad all in the same breath. It makes me wonder what were the parts that I didn't cherish enough...what parts did I allow to slip through my fingers not knowing how really precious they were? I especially think about this now that my own children are getting older but also because the people I love most are getting older. My precious grandmother turning 83...my brothers are no longer children...they are grown men with lives and families and bringing their own precious babies into this world. Yesterday I sat and loved on our sweet Ivy and thought about how much I couldn't wait for her daddy to come into this world...I reflected on the precious moments that I got to hold our sweet baby Charlie and how even though we will never get to love on him again here on earth he will forever be in our hearts and waiting for us in heaven. I'm sure our precious granddaddy...his namesake...is telling him all kinds of stories right now as they wait for us to join the fun. It's hard to think about how quickly time flies in one breath and in the next I'm so ready to see those sweet faces that have gone ahead of me. Time waits for no one...it marches on and continues whether we are ready or not.
In this busy season of my life the Lord has been heavy on my heart to rest and reflect. What is the pace for...is it for Him...does He get the glory? The truth is if He doesn't then why am I letting any time slip through my hands for it? I truly believe God brings this reflection so that we do live intentionally for Him and His purpose and not our own. I want my precious girls to always see that their momma did all she did for them and for Him. If I'm not fulfilling that then what am I fulfilling? Is it worth the time that is so quickly slipping through my fingers.
Lord today I pray for discernment, clarity and purpose. Thank you for ALWAYS speaking right to my heart exactly when I need it most. In the quiet still moments Father I long to only hear your voice. Thank you for the clarity that comes with that. May your plan always be all that I seek and only for your glory!
Psalm 86:12I will give thanks to You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And will glorify Your name forever.
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